The second thing that happened after we got home from the farm last week was that our DSL modem broke.  It went kaput and now it’s Day 5 of our high speed internet drought.  We have dial up but that’s like saying that your car is in the shop and you’re driving Fred Flintstone’s car.

After about ten calls and hours spent on the phone with EarthLink (now known as NoLink), they are are shuffling their feet about sending a new modem to us.  They promised to overnight a new modem to us on Thursday and when I called yesterday to see where this modem was, I was told that it was never sent.

Instead, I got a whole lot of, “I understand why you are frustrated.”

I don’t need understanding.

I need a new modem.

After some more hiccups - one guy actually wanted to call Apple to see if Earthlink’s high speed modems were compatible to Macs - I finally got someone who was able to process what I wanted them to do.

“You can expect your modem in 2 - 3 business days,” she said

“Wait.  I thought you said you were going to overnight it to me.”

“Yes.  I’ll arrive in 2-3 business days.”

“So overnight doesn’t actually mean overnight.  It’s means 2-3 business days.”

Then she tried to upsell me on some virus protection.  What the fuck?  Do I look like I just ordered a Big Mac and am waiting for the extra value meal offer?

Obviously, the lack of internet is making us a little stir crazy here.  I don’t know how man ever survived without it.

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