Since Lee-Roy’s post about his shopping list doodle, I’ve become obsessed with seeing other people’s shopping lists. It’s certainly voyueristic; you get to see someone totally unguarded, since a shopping list – at the very moment of list making – is basically a private snapshot of the inside of your brain, made for your eyes only, to jog your memory at the grocery store. But when its let out into the public, entries get taken out of context, get put into the viewers’ context, and misunderstandings occur and glimpses far beyond the simple “what this person likes to eat and keep in the home” take place; at its most basic, seeing others’ shopping list is sort of an anthropological documentary and at its most insidious, its a look into the person’s soul.
I remember an occasion back when I was 13. On a lazy afternoon of videogames, my friend Bubbahenneth and I decided to order a pizza. He dialed the number of our local pizza parlor and was put on hold. We dicussed the toppings for our pizza which he wrote down on the back of a phonebook: pepperoni, sausage, mushroom, and green peppers.
After he finished ordering, I happened to look at the phonebook and above all our ordered toppings, which he scribbled down as we negotiated, was “chicky,” scrawled in an unusual, shaky penmanship. I intuitively understood this to mean “chicken” – and after some prodding, I found out I was right – but never once did chicken come up as a topping. Bubbahenneth was a little roly poly – round with a famous appetite. He was hungry. Unconsciously, he wrote “chicky” on the phonebook as we discussed toppings, daydreaming about chicken.
Ater laughing at him, I was struck by it: separated from the rest of the toppings and rendered in this odd handwriting, “chicky” seemed vulnerable, imbued with a heartbreaking sense of longing and loneliness.
But I digress, back to Lee-Roy’s shopping list, which consists of:
Charcoal
Beer
Carrots (3)
Mint (fresh) [jhk says: amended, see below]
(or taragon)
Lemons (2)
Limes (for beer)
French Baguette
Lettuce (Butter) (2)
Lettuce (Romaine) (1)
3 tomatoes
Brownie Mix (Classic Fudge Brownie by Bettie Crocker or Crusteaz)
Ketchup
?
Buns?
Seems to indicate that Lee-Roy and Jamie are having a barbecue. But if they’re having a BBQ, where on the list is the to be barbecued? And upon closer inspection, look at the specificity regarding the lettuces, the brands for brownie mix, and the notation that the limes are for the beer.
This exacting nature doesn’t jibe with the non-specificity of the “?”.
And what does it say about a household that is butter lettuce dominant?
And fresh mint and tarragon cannot be used interchangeably in a recipe, so what’s up with that? You can’t make a Tarragon Julip or Tarragon Ice Cream (ugh, I think I just made myself throw up).
Fascinating.
If you’re as fascinated as me, check out this link which is a compilation of hella grocery lists.
Just today at Whole Foods, I was jonesing to see some random person’s grocery list. Mary Milan said I was acting like those lecherous “show me your tits” guys at Mardi Gras so I stopped.
We don’t keep one but here’s what I bought the last time I went grocery shopping:
- Frozen chicken and cheese tamales (2 packs of 2)
- Strawbery juice popsicles
- Alpha Lipoic Acid
- A big 30 pack of Breyers Fruit Swirls
What’s on your grocery list? Or what did you buy the last time you were at the market? Use the comments if your comfortable showing me your…lists!
Oh, now you have gone too far!
By the way, you forgot the “(fresh)” after “Mint” and I think I spelled Krusteaz “Crusteez” (though I realize it is illedgible). As long as you’re obsessing over details like “Chicky” vs. Chicken, I thought these small discrepancies should be noted.
Also by the way, you had me laughing my friggin ass off.
This is a great project. I just typed up my list, and was about to include explanations, but I think it’s more fun without:
onion [crossed out]
pasta [crossed out]
minced garlic
hand soap
laundry detergent [crossed out]
glasses cleaner
cereal
cat food
cat litter
lee-roy: the (fresh) was accidentally erased because wordpress thinks its a tag (since I tried to use those brackets above your , and . keys). i’m going to amend it with parenthesis so that it actually reflects your list. also, for some bizarre reason, there’s part of me that thinks Bubbahenneth actually spelled it “chichy.” I obsessed late last night as to which spelling to go with and it still bothers me.
cheryl: no explanations are always best. i have to wonder why buy minced garlic?
These syntaxical or spelling errors are minor things, really, and hardly worth correcting or even mentioning, but I often feel compelled to point them out, against my better judgement. So thanks for being patient.
Now, to take a look at your list… Where do you get these Strawberry juice popsicles? They sound delicious. And what is this Alpha Lipoic Acid? Not really familiar with the fruit swirls, either, but it sounds to me like you had ice-cold fruit-juice-sweetened refreshment on the brain.
As for Cheryl’s list… Hmmm, a bit on the dry side there, Cheryl. Except perhaps for the minced garlic. That spices it up a little. Can’t say I’ve bought it minced before, but you bypass the peeling of the fresh stuff, which can be a little laborious. I see some prioritizing going on here. Maybe you can wear those clothes an extra day, get by on some leftovers, but breakfast is the most important meal of the day, cleanliness is next to godliness and the cats are a must, because their well-being can determine whether you get a full night’s sleep and fend off getting those smelly suprises.
Sorry. Syntaxical is not a word. It should be syntactical.
Indeed the negation of items before going to the store is interesting and it seems as if you have the minced garlic, you may not need the handsoap.
And you get Stawberry Juice popsicles at Trader Joe’s. They are supposedly quite delectable but Mary Milan is hording them, not letting me try them so I wouldn’t know. Breyer’s Fruit Swirls are they are ice-cold fruit juice refreshment, she’ll let me eat those, I think because we have sooooo many. And finally, Alpha Lipoic acid is a powerful antioxidant that works with the mitochondria of your cells. it’s dope.
Yo, check it out:
Mint (fresh)
‹taragon›
grrr… correction: ‹or taragon›
okay. enough ocd madness.